” Love life and she will Love you back”
So you are bored. Here are some games that will land you in a very interesting and fun place where you do not work and tattoos are cool.
You get bonus points if you can get through the first five without being hit with a police stick and double bonus if you can finish them without landing a death penalty.
Firstly you must be stopped by the police let us say for a speeding ticket.
1) Ask the police offer what he is doing out so late.
2) Draw happy faces all over his ticket book
3) Ask him if his bulletproof vest would protect him if you started vomiting bullets
4) Ask him if you can take his squad car out for a joy ride.
5) Explain the speeding with, ’’See officer, I was driving along when I dropped my bag of crack. I tried to pick it up but my gun fell and jammed my foot on the gas petal.’’
6) When he tries to talk to you have the radio on full blast and look straightforward and breathe in out very loudly. Do not even acknowledge his presence.
7) Tell him you wanted to be a cop but decided to graduate high school instead
8) Pay all your ticket fines with coins
9) When he walks up to you look at his gut and say, ‘’I thought you had to be physically fit in order to be a cop.’’
10) Pretend to be deaf when the cop comes to you window and halfway through the conversation turn up the radio and start singing along.
11) When the cop is talking to you roll the window up and down and ignore looking totally amazed that the window goes up and down
12) When he tries to open the door, taunt him by locking the door when he tries to open it and unlocking it when he looks away. Repeat several times.
13) Tell him that there is nothing in the boot and he should not check the boot. Keep acting as if you are trying to conceal something in the boot even though there is absolutely nothing there.
14) If they tell you to get out and put the hands on the hood. Get out, lie on the ground, and ask him to outline you with chalk.
15) If you are put in the squad car, sing ‘’Mary Had A Little Lamb’’ loudly and obnoxiously all the way to the police department.
Children under the age of 18 should not try these and you do these at your own risk. You can go to jail for disorderly conduct and have a permanent record so think about this first.
GOOD LUCK!
Careful Confessions 